Monday, April 12, 2010


Iryna is three years old and from Eastern Europe. She is a sweet, sweet little girl. We are so blessed with the most amazing little boys Sebastian 9, and Dillon. To call them amazing kind of seems like an understatement to me. they are the loves of our life and I can't imagine not ever having them. I still look at them everynight as they sleep and get chocked up. The love I feel for them runs so deep and we feel so fortunate that God has blessed us with them. I know that they are going to be amazing big brothers, and I feel so fortunate for them to have Iryna and she them. When we started this journey years ago...... we wanted to adopt a child as healthy as possible and we thought well thats just how it should and would be. well that is far from the case. Most people think with love these children will flourish. The truth is they have not spent there first few years with the love and nurturing most children do, they have been devoid of all this. So one day I came across Reeces rainbow, an adoption ministry for special needs kids. They have placed hundreds of special needs children that would otherwise be institutionalized if not adopted. that word is not to be taken lightly either, that is just what will happen. These children will spend the majority of there life strapped in a bed with no love. These children are not viewed as special like they are in the U.S. There is a desperate need for them to find the love of a family. So of course i poured over this site and my eyes were opened more so than ever before. When I came to the HIV positive section I felt drawn. So I dug deeper and educated myself. Even as an R.N. I felt like "what people would adopt HIV children" that is scary, dangerous. Well that is so far from the truth, and so many people are uneducated about HIV. There is a huge stigma that clings to HIV. The truth is HIV is no longer a terminal illness but chronic illness if you have access to the right meds and care. Children with HIV can live as long as other children without HIV. HIV is also very hard to transmit. To name a few it can not be transmitted through saliva, urine, feces, sharing cups, utensils, baths, pools, sneezing to say the least. The virus is very fragile and dies very quickly when exposed to air. It is however transmitted sexually and through direct blood to blood contact. Meaning we both would have to have large open cuts come in contact with each other. I will post a few facts I found below also. Having two other children though I also wanted to make sure and never would put them at risk. What I have learned has been an education myself even as a healthcare provider. I only wish I could advocate and educate more people, so more of these children could come home. In Irynas country though children and adults alike do not always have the access and care that we here in America do. Without the proper medications there lives could be cut short and they could suffer the nasty complications that sometimes associate with HIV. Not only that they could suffer alone and without the love of a family. There for these kids are in desperate need, no more less deserving than any other child. After all this how could we just turn away. This journey for me started out to adopt a healthy child but more so to have a daughter but for the first time that has shifted. For me this has changed it is no longer about just having a daughter but it is about Iryna. I also should mention that all along I have led (to put it lightly) my husband on this journey. He has never been gung ho about adoption, he would love to have another child through birth. We definately have not been seeing eye to eye about this for a long time. But for him that has all changed, he is charging faster ahead than me. Now if you knew my husband you would think what, never would Michael agree to adopt an HIV positive child. he on his own though has educated himself on this and would not now have this any other way or any other child. For me this is HUGE, God has layed this on his heart and I truly believe opened his eyes also. We are scared though because there are all the what ifs. But just like any person or child there are no definites. What tomorrow may bring is always a mystery. To me I have amazingly (if you know me) come to the point of given up control and found a peacefullness I have never known in this. This past year I lost my Dad, he was my rock. Every ounce of him that he ever gave me or my children was pure love. I am still angry but trust God had a very good reason to take hime. My dad was an amazing man, a humanitarium in every sense of the word. He has instilled in me the gift of kindness and love. I feel so fortunate to have had a parent like that, and I only hope I can continue to give his gifts to my children. I was raised Catholic but somewhere along the way kind of stepped out of line with my faith. Through my dads passing I have somehow felt reunited with God and feel his precense in my life stronger than ever, for this I feel blessed to have found my way back to him. And I can only think that my dad is somehow involved in this. I know I got off topic a little there and I am sorry.

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