I can not beleive it, we have an appointment November 2, 2010 at the SDA. This moment seemed as if it would never come, I think part of me beleived it wouldn't. Adoption has been part of our lives for so long now, and with it has come great loss and great happiness. I have questioned and prayed time and time again for God's will in all of this. I have tried to close doors and walk away at times but every road has led me back here. And in the process of this I have learned so much and so much about myself. I have also felt my relashonship with God deepen to depths I have never felt possible. Adoption is not for the weak of heart, the emotional bumps along the way are huge as will the big bump my family will feel when the dynamics once again change. But i beleive God has put us right were we are supposed to be, I have felt so weary along the way and leaned on him for all things, finding more comfort than I have ever known in that.
I worked over night last night and came home to an e-mail from my wonderful facilitator here saying that we have an appointment at the SDA (State Dept of Adoptions in Eastern Europe) on November 2. In a heartbeat I felt the anxiety creep up and fear take over. This was supposed to be the most joyous moment but I instantly let my human fear take over. In two short weeks we need to be across the world to meet a little girl that is so unaware at the changes that are about to take place in her world. Not only that I started thinking of my own two boys and all the changes there world is about to take. So all I could do is pray, pray for comfort, strength and guiadance. And as I did this the calmness and joy started to creep in and assure me that all was right and ok. I want to write so much more but I am exhausted after working all night last night and am getting ready to go do it again tonight. So for now I leave you a sweet little picture of Evelyn =)))
